Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
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