he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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