her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
