I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Randomize