Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Two words: blizzard sex
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
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