You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
Randomize
