there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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