It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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