listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
we should paint friendship bongs
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