you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
It's blow job season.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
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