he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
