When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize