That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize