i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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