she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize
