i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Randomize
