apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize