3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
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