so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
I have feelings that need drinking.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
