At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Randomize
