Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
