i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Randomize
