ya dads aren't the best wingmen
At least make sure they are 18
Why
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
Randomize
