the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
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