im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
My orgasm happened in two different decades
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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