i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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