hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
