Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
Do you remember whose house we're in?
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
