He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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