Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
Randomize