Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
My liver just had a heart attack.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
Randomize
