I think im going to throw up on grandma
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
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