North Korea, Best Korea!
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
