Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
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