So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize
