And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Randomize
