The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize
