Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
I forgot wine drunk hurts
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Randomize
