the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
Randomize
