Her vagina should come with caution tape.
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize