I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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