Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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