Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize