Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
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