Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
birth control should be required to get into college
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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