You work out of a Hotel?
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
