you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
