you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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