You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
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