I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
It's blow job season.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
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