I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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