So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Randomize
