I am puke
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize
