one two three fourrrrnication!
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Randomize
